Secret Single Behavior

the stuff you do when you’re totally alone

My husband has been traveling a lot for work lately, which isn’t easy but one silver lining? I get to indulge in my Secret Single Behavior, “SSB.” A highly relatable term that became part of the cultural lexicon à la Sex and the City when Aidan moved in with Carrie. You know the scene: “What’d you do? Who did you see?” With Aidan suddenly taking over her personal space, Carrie found herself longing for the days when she could indulge in her SSB, “the stuff you do when you’re totally alone, things you’d never want your boyfriend to see you do.”

For some, SSB is eating dinner while standing in the kitchen, straight out of the fridge (no plate required), or binge-watching trashy reality TV with zero shame while wearing the same oversized, soft, worn-in t-shirt from college. Maybe it’s putting on a face mask, exfoliating your feet, throwing on a robe, and inspecting your pores in a magnifying mirror. Or perhaps it’s as simple as leaving “the chair” piled with clothes (you know the one!) or letting dishes linger in the sink while luxuriating in the freedom to do absolutely nothing…just because you can. When you’re single, you’re in your own world, governed by your own rules. And maybe that’s what’s nice about rekindling with SSB now - in this season as a wife and mom, it’s the joy of retreating into my own world, focusing on just me for a bit when in reality, my whole world revolves around everyone else.